Hello eveyone!

 

So it would seem that some of our dear readers are looking at this blog and going "What is this all about then?".  Frankly we thought no-one but us (and the ex-Glads) read this, but it would appear that we are gaining International fame (thank you Gl. In the Bushes!).

 

I could give you all a quick history, but instead, in glorious technicolour...(drumroll) the history of FGWFC as reported by Gl. Anorak all those years ago in a damp Hackney pub!!

 

 

With that, we close out with the always wise words of Gladys Terminator

If anyone should find a comfortable, slightly baggy pair of shorts, please contact Gl. Austin Powers, who has spent most of her first football free day trawling the streets of Chicago looking for them.  Sadly the many many kinds of shorts seen by other Glads en route have not met the high standards that Gl. AP requires, and we hope that the search party dispatched earlier today is successful.

Hello dear readers!

 

We have been a little slow with our updates as there has been a lot going on!  Sad to say that the Glads lost out on penalties to a local Chicago team in the quarter finals, but we were at once both put off and wildly encouraged by the fantastic support we were given by Hackney WFC (yes, Hackney, our traditional Gladys rivals).  Could this be the start of a beautiful friendship?  We will be cheering Hackney as they progress.

 

We have had two very tough days, but were delighted to see a fantastic goal scored by Gladys Swan Vesta who almost uprooted the goal posts with the ferocity of her shot to take our knockout game to penos.  Gladys In the Bushes played in every position (except goalie) and has done much to improve our international relations with new friends from around the world.  She also has a fine collection of wax-based hair products to share out as required.

 

This will be the last blog entry until we return (or until I can walk down the stairs comfortably), but here's the rundown of the Gladys injuries.  We at Gladys West are incredibly proud of our beloved Glads who put heart, soul and a fair amount of bodily pain into this tournament and helped spread the good Gladys name far and wide.

 

Gladys Billie Jean - sprained left ankle, duff right knee, stud marks on feet

Gladys Digger - busted ribs, knee knack (right)

Gladys Swan Vesta - ankle knack (right), sunstroke and all over sunburn

Gladys Dr Tre - incredible amount of bruising and floppy hair

Gladys Jaffa - 2 knee knacks

Gladys Hollywood - no tan

Gladys Dr O - ankle sprain and out for 3 weeks

 

And we must also mention the Gladys WAGS - Mrs Pam Ayres for stepping in and helping out in our time of need, and Mrs M &M and Mrs Digger for their endless support, muscle rubs and fantastic new swear words (-:

 

We are looking forwards already to next year's world cup...venue, time, location to be revealed! (when we find out)

So unlike Copenhagen Day 1 (see August 2005 blog), we awoke with no hangover, and to the gentle screech of the alarm clock, and the sound of Dunny Queen roaming the corridors, her mating call echoing along the halls...

 

After a small 2 gallon coffee (or tea) we were off!  Remembering the wise words of Gladys Jaffa we sought to fight our way through rush hour, expecting to get there at 9am (2 hours remember?).

 

So at just before 8am all the Glads bar one were standing in a rather empty venue, scratching our collective heads.  Gladys Jaffa volunteered that she *might* have thought the venue was further away...

 

We were due to play a team called "Bent like Beckham".  Gladys Swan Vesta scouted around, and said "Well, I recognise some of them, they won the gold in Sydney 2002...". 

 

At this point also we were still awaiting the arrival of Dr O...stuck somewhere en route.

 

Come the hour, and it was time for kick-off.  The Glads hastily re-arranged the formation (Dr O was heading for New York City, and might be some time in getting back) and put in a fabulous performance.  Pam Ayres and Digger came close with two efforts, and then, disastrously a lapse in Gladys concentration (oh the pain!) and 2 goals went in.  Gladys Billie-Jean had to make a couple of saves, and Dr Tre and Hollywood were marshalling the back line well.

 

Gladys Digger was quite literally mown down by one of the opposition,and, just like Dunny in Copenhagen was carted off to the medical tent with suspected fractured ribs.  And then we were 11...

 

Come the second half, and another lapse led to another 2 goals going in.  And then Dr Tre became possesed.  We suspect that someone popped some Irish Whiskey into her half-time water, and she stopped anyone getting through, leaving Billie-Jean to shout lots of encouragement and do not very much.

 

So although we did not win this game, a fine fine Gladys performance, coupled with the exciting news that Dr O has purchased a map of the state of Illionois and believes she might even appear in time for our double-header tomorrow!

 

One final word on the heat.  It's rather warm here - it's about 37 celcuis (many Farenheit), and tomorrow is meant to be hotter. 

 

GBJ

Hello dear readers!

 

All the Glads were together for the first time for our practice session; it went very well. We're looking forwards to our first game, but all the talk at the moment is about the expected heatwave that's coming...

 

We drafted in a last minute replacement who is available for a couple of days...step forwards Mrs Pam Ayres!  Mrs Pam Ayres is a right footed midfielder/defender who likes to hassle and harry the opposition to great effect.  We welcome her and her headband to the team :)

 

First game is tomorrow.  Gladys Jaffa advises us that we need 2 hours to get there...so wake up at 6:45!  (and a message to Holly (you know who you are...) I said I wasn't on holiday!)

 

Gladys Billie-Jean

It would appear that our Gladys namesake Billie-Jean is attracting a certain amount of interest, as local resident and sometime tennis player, Billie-Jean King lives here.

 

Here are the answers to the top 5 Gl.Billie-Jean questions encountered so far.

 

1) GBJ has not seen "The legend of Billie-Jean"

2) GBJ does play tennis, but hasn't for a bit, and isn't doing so here

3) GBJ doesn't mind if you want to take a picture of the back of her shirt

4) Yes, it's football, not soccer

5) Not Glaps, Glads  No, not Glaids.  No, G..l..a..d..s..

Yes dear readers, it is true!  Gladyses Swan Vesta and Billie Jean were interviewed by Radio WGRN (or something like that) on their way to the Gay Games football meeting this morning.  Honestly can't say what will make it to the air, and indeed if they could make out our strong London accents, but the Glads are keeping up with their media frenzy thus far!

 

Hello dear readers from the sunny climes of Chicago!

 

Glads set off nice and early on Friday from the UK, having collectively had around 5 hours of sleep.  Gladys Bille-Jean and Swan Vesta were met at Gladys West by Dr Tre, Hollywood and Austin Powers before heading off to the airport.

 

We departed at 5:30

At 5:33 we returned to Gladys West so that Gladys Hollywood could retrieve her airplane ticket

at 5:39 we departned (again) for Heathrow.

 

On arrival in Chicago the Gladyses (Hollywood and Love Muscle  after a quick body search by customs!) were met by Gladys and Mrs Digger.  It was fantastic to see them there in our lovely shirts.  And onto the heatwave that is Chicago!  After some trundling around the airport we were led to the largest SUV we had seen (we are from England mostly after all) and we piled on in.  About three minutes into the journey (and mid conversation with Digger about all things Gay Games) we were interrupted by an enormous cry of "MAGGOTMOTHERFUCKER!" from Mrs Digger.  From what we could tell we had narrowly avoided something, or Mrs Digger was unhappy about something...  Either way, silence fell inside the cavernous cab, until Gladys Love Muscle began giggling deliriously from heatstroke and jetlag.

 

[at some point I will write more about the hotel]

 

So onto the ceremony, where we stood around filed under G for Great Britain and scuppering any carefully worked out plans to be close to the USA for our US Glads.  There were a lot of people wanting photos of them with the Glads - could it be our admirabilus bellus or our spiritus et genius?  Perhaps after all it was the swanky new purple kit we were wearing. 

 

We filed into the stadium after a couple of hours and then crammed into the small space behind the field (all 7000 of us!) where it was hot, sticky and sweaty.  Ewwww. But the Brits were in fine fine voice with lots of singing and chanting.  and finally we were out!  Walking out under the Great Britain sign with our rainbow flag a flapping in the (welcome) breeze, with the stadium (almost) full was incredible.  and after the Athletes (yes, they *do* mean us..) all walked out, it was finally finally time to sit down, in the front two rows and watch the Opening Ceremony.

 

 After a slow start it was an event worth waiting for.  The best visual display was the lighting of the official Gay Games flame (although it took three goes!) and an excellent Fireworks display.  Unfortunately Dunny Queen, Powers, Hollywood, Jaffa and Tre all passed out half-way through and had to retire, but Digger, Gladys and Mrs Pam Ayres, GBJ and Swan Vesta all stayed and watched an excellent second half.  Best performance was Heather Small singing the song that London used for the 2012 Olympics (www.london2012.org).

 

So finally weary Glads trudged home, having been up for an estimated (well, some of them) 35 hours.

Hello again dear readers

 

Imagine our surprise when in the mailbox at Gladys West came a little missive from none other than Gladys Farrah Fawcett!

 

Here is the message

 

 Dear Glad Baggers,

Greetings from the Wilderness...

Just a bit of short shrift to wish you well on your international duties!

Go and plant a big boot on the rear of the opposition..and bring home a medal!!

 I shall be thinking of you as you chase lots of nice leggy opposition around the pitch...

Lucky or what?

Look forward to catching up on your return...take care.

Love  and Kusses.........Fawcett

Did we mention she got booked a lot?

Dear readers

 

The London based Glads took to the hills and (literally) vales of Regent's Park this Sunday for a last warm up game against KIKK Utd.  The sun shone, dogs dragged small children around on a leash and we were graced by the (ever so slightly late) presence of Gladys Lionel Blair (knee) and some supporters from Camden FC.

 

Gladys Line up:

GK - Gladys Billie Jean

Backs - Gladys Dr Tre and Gladys Hollywood

Mids - Gladys Prince and Gladys Austin Powers

Striker - Gladys Swan Vesta

 

In summary we played well after a shaky start getting used to the conditions.  Gladys Bille Jean was subbed in the first half (in true Dave Save preservation style) and a German defender from Acton Sports Club came in to cover to great effect :)

 

Gladys Swan Vesta scored a lovely peach of a lob that was declared over the bar.  Using the miracle of technology we outline here that, in 1966 style, the ball DID cross the line...under the bar..

                                   

Swan Vesta                        ball  -- ----     --------  ---         |

0                               the  --                   0                ----     |

|--                      of     --                      --| Kikk               ----|

/\              path      --                            /\ Keeper               |  O --> height of ball

                                                                                              on the goal-line

 

Swan Vesta then fell into a large ditch in the middle of the pitch.   She was rescued by Gladyses Prince and Powers, using long grass to fashion a rope ladder.  The shock was all too much and she retired to be comforted by Lionel Blair on the sidelines.

 

So we were out of Subs!  Enter Camden FC youth player and striker who proceeded to run around the pitch in her jeans chatting on her phone and annoying the Swedes while Prince stepped up and scored two goals to seal the match for the Glads!  (Camden youth player and striker did play v.well and many thanks for her running around efforts!)

 

Quote from Gladys Prince.."If you're going to play me in the playmaker role, I'm going to have the playmaker temperament".  Unfortunately all Gladys Billie Jean could think of at that time was Bobby Charlton...here's hoping Prince retains more hair than him. 

 

All in all a good result for the Glads, and we look forwards to flying out on Saturday!

 

GBJ

We at Gladys West were most surprised to find a message mysteriously arriving from Gladys Dr Tre this morning.

 

I had a dream..........last night about the Gay Games. We were playing a match, my friend was in the stands watching.......you were all being lazy shites except for Gladys Hollywood so i got in a Gladys Prince like strop with you all, tore around the whole pitch like a mad yoke and scored 2 goals!!

 

Now, we're not one to count premontions as anything other than too much cheese before bedtime, but perhaps Gladys Tre should consider becoming a doctor of Futureology rather than the study of the bits that other doctors don't reach?*

 

Only Dr Tre knows....

 

GBJ

*Unless they want to get into trouble.